I GOT THE MASK!!

My New Mask! (Same Model)

The mask I’ve wanted since I was 14 – I just made a deal for one!!

Stay tuned for the custom paint-job I’ll create for it…This should be interesting to say the least…The professional mask painter I’m using is:

http://eyecandyair.com/

YESSS!!! Everything is coming together.

- Jeff Emmerson

My Gloves are on Their Way…Another Step Closer.

Beauuuutifullll

I just pulled the trigger on this mint condition professional-level blocker and glove, so I put another notch in the “Step Closer” column ;o). They ship from Calgary on Monday!

Watching the Tim Hortons hockey commercials reminds me of why I miss this game so very much – It’s in my heart, and that will never change. I nearly get a tear in my eye every time the commercial plays. That tells me something.

TEAM CANADA = GOLD MEDAL in Vancouver at the 2010 Olympics!!!

- Jeff Emmerson

Thank You to Everyone for Stopping By

Above: The mask I’ve wanted since the age of 14….NEVER, EVER GIVE UP ON YOUR TRUEST DREAMS! I’m about to finally live mine!

Whatever happens from here on in, I want to say thank you to each of you who have stopped by to read my blog…It means the world to me.

I’m living this life of mine on my terms, as you should for yourself. Never be afraid to follow YOUR heart.

- Jeff Emmerson

PUTTING MY BOOK ON HOLD

Like My Return to Goaltending, My Book is In The Making. Patience is Indeed a Virtue.

In the shower tonight, it came to me: Put my book on hold, so that my story can play itself out some more…It’s not ready yet.

I’ve decided to listen to my gut, and yes, I’ll keep writing, but won’t be publishing anything just yet. I want this story to be the best it can, and that means achieving some goals before letting it all out for the world to read. That way, my story will be so much more heartfelt and inspiring (that’s my hope, anyway).

Stay tuned.

- Jeff Emmerson

A Couple Inspiring Videos of a Goalie I Know

Aah, YES……I want to return so bad that I can literally TASTE it….

Awesome videos, Darren. Nice Mask ;o) I’m going to record a couple of my practices as well, once I’m back in top form.

- Jeff Emmerson

My Return To The Ice…

I can't wait to return to the ice...

I’m about to head to class, and I’m daydreaming of my return to the ice, which is getting closer, day by day.

My book will explain it all much better.

- Jeff Emmerson

To Those Who Wonder…

DECEMBER 2006, MY OLD (TINY) APARTMENT, AND A BEAUTIFUL GUITAR....

What is life all about? Why the heck are we faced with all these challenges and beautiful moments?

Hmm….I can’t say for sure, and that’s putting it nicely, so I’ll simply put it this way:

I don’t know. What I’ve come to learn is that while nothing is guaranteed, we’ve got to live our lives the way that feels right to each of us, no matter what’s going on. Sure – I know I speak a good game, but it’s true. That said, we’ve got to jump through a ton of hoops to enjoy life in this society, and I’m really not complaining, per se.

I might sound like I’m preaching at moments in my diary here, but believe me – I’m just like you, where I’m trying to figure out just how the hell to be happy, as complicated (or ironically simple) as that pursuit may end up proving to be.

I’m deep, yeah I know…But so are a million others out there. This is why I even bother working hard to get my book out there: Because there are other “Jeff Emmerson’s” out there, and they need to (deserve to) know that there are people just like them out there…People who want more from life, and people who wonder…

- Jeff Emmerson

A New Chapter Begins, With “New” Music in My Ears

Well….I’m not sure exactly where to start, but I know how I feel. Montreal is all but out of my system, since I’ve had a while to let it all sink in, to then make peace with this whole “Montreal” thing – this obsession with seeking out the closure to a chapter of turmoil, doubt, and fear (of the ramifications of my day-to-day decisions while rushing into both marriage and an instant family, since my ex had 2 young children).

Wow – time does wonders, and I can’t say that strongly enough. I’m headed in wonderful new directions, and they balance each other out naturally to keep me sane and satisfied all at once. How cool is that?

I’ve got to say this much: No matter what came along in life, having a positive and optimistic outlook (even through some heartbreaking moments, however you do it) changes everything. It really, really, REALLY does. I swear it.

‘Back to helping in the editing of my manuscript…I have to add that Vanessa Carlton’s 2002 album “Be Not Nobody” is playing more and more in my ears. I’ve fallen in love with her depth all over again, and as “dark” as her music might sound, I absolutely love her first album. It may sound dark to you, but it may well be a sound of moving forward in a perverted way to my mind and heart…Isn’t variety the spice of life??

You bet it is – so what works for you in this life? Is it music, good friends, or any number of other things?

Whatever it is, continue on your path, and be true to you. We all get caught up in things, but I’m sincerely glad that I’ll be in the field of Social Work (Correctional setting) in one way or another, once I’m done university.

You see – yes, I make some VERY honest entries in my forthcoming book, and sure, that may hurt me by way of peers incorrectly judging me, but I simply don’t care about that, since I know better….I know that this is my story, my heart’s feelings, my hopes, my screw-ups, and my lessons learned, to say the least. In the end, anyone who believes in the human condition will not judge me harshly, but will in fact respect my passion for truth and actualization.

I’ve learned to forgive myself for my mistakes, and to never, ever, EVER let them hold me back, even if it means I give my life in the process through being so intensely focused.

That said, I want a full life of love, purpose and joy, so that balance I mentioned is ever-more important these days, I’ve found. I have a LOT more to live for than I ever imagined I would.

Goodbye, Montreal…Hello 2010!! Things are REALLY about to get good!

- Jeff Emmerson

UPDATE

Such Soulful Depth...

I’m immersed in school, preparing to move, and continuing the editing process on my manuscript, so stay tuned!! My mission is to get a copy of my book into Daryl Hall’s hands, since the 2006 Hall & Oates concert I attended inspired me to finally start writing my story, after all!

- Jeff Emmerson

A Photographer Captured Us on New Year’s Eve!

Caught taking a brief breather after dancing up a storm!

We were photographed on New Year’s Eve in Montreal at Club 1234 while awaiting midnight, and we made it to the website, which is a wonderful keepsake. What a night it was…It couldn’t have gone better! 2010 has already started off amazingly!

- Jeff Emmerson

I Saw Myself Last Night…When I was 16 Years Old.

The Way I Was...Way Back When, and Someday Again.

My girlfriend and I took in a Jr. B level hockey game last night, and as always, it brought me back in time, to a place I’ll never forget. I was in my mid-teens, and I was a goalie on the highest level team that I could be on for my age at the time (All-Star “AA”) in Waterloo, Ontario.

I’d have to write many pages to do this story the truest justice, but I already do that in my upcoming book, so I’ll just say this:

Seeing the way that last night’s game turned out, period by period, was frustrating to say the least. I realized that I miss the game very much (playing in a competitive league, that is), and also that I would make an excellent coach. I was touched by seeing myself in the goalie who got pulled after letting in only 3 goals, all of which weren’t easy saves, and he’d also kept his team in the game through a slew of saves he’d made all the while. He was rightly very angry, and made a bit of a spectacle of it all (being that age, it wasn’t surprising, I have to say), but I could tell that he was hurting inside. He was as mad as hell that he was pulled out too soon, and I said to my girlfriend that I almost walked over to show him some support through encouraging words, since it was like I was watching MYSELF from years ago…

I found him on Facebook, and let him know a few positive thoughts, and to NEVER, EVER give up, since I did, and I’ve always regretted it…I told him that I’m too old to go back and work my tail off, knowing all that I do now, but that he has every opportunity to make his dreams come true in hockey, since he has amazing potential. I saw how fast he moves, how agile he was, and I had to reach out and offer him support, when so few others ever do, especially as a goaltender.

It means nothing to you I’m sure, but to me, at his age, it would have meant everything to get the support needed to carry on and not quit the game…There are about a million other factors at work in any person’s life, but you get the point.

A young man and his dream…Nothing could be more important as the lessons he will learn along the way, regardless of the ultimate outcome.

I don’t want him to have the regret that I do down the road. I can’t save everyone, I know that, but it doesn’t mean that every child with glasses who reminds me of myself way back when doesn’t pull strings within me. The same goes for goalies.

You see, some dreams never die. I sense there’s another way to give back. I hope my message has its desired effect. Either way, I reached out to this young man. That felt good in itself.

- Jeff Emmerson

Another Relevant (and Absolutely Beautiful) Song…

Well said, Vanessa…..So true. No doubt this will inspire my future writing in some wonderful way.

Starting my SECOND Book!

Aah, how the years fly by! 1986-87 School Year

I’ve started writing my SECOND book, while continuing the editing process on my Autobiography to be published late in 2010!

I’m hooked!
- Jeff Emmerson

Perspective

I received an email from someone last night in response to an ad I’d placed looking for a professional editor for my book (I’ve already found someone excellent, and what a feeling it is when you know you’ve found the type of person you’re proud to help shape your story with), and it was totally negative and void of any energy at all. Why am I mentioning it? To show how such thinking does us NO good in life, quite simply.

It basically said that I shouldn’t even try to get published, ’cause no one would accept my book, and it would gradually break my heart, since my life story means the world to me, as it should. He also said that no one else cares about my experience.

I could immediately tell that this was (in a way) a cry for help from this person’s internal “compass”. Why the heck would someone put energy into such negativity toward someone else?

It happens every minute of every day. Those who (for whatever reason) feel less than good about themselves tend to run others’ ambitions down. We all know why…This is textbook Psychology, and we’ve got to be able to immediately spot such opportunities to remind those in a dark place that life IS the challenge.

This outlook is in my D.N.A. as a result of things I’ve gone through, as well as how I chose to take my life back, and be a proverbial freight train in response, learning to find better solutions to life’s challenges, and most importantly, a new outlook that would change EVERYTHING. It’s a lifelong journey, but I’m sure as hell a lot stronger than I was, and nothing can stop me now…..NOTHING….Unless I make the conscious choice and decision to let it.

We pick our battles in life (so to speak), and I think of that in a positive way. No one taught me how to be strong in school – that was on me to learn through peers, role-models and other POSITIVE influences.

You see? Everything IS everything. Attitude is what will make or break your spirit and dreams.

Have the courage to NOT think like the majority (those who are negative) and watch how your life will change for the better. I absolutely love living this way, and damn it, I deserve it!

So do you, but this means nothing unless you feel the pain of living on autopilot, and DO SOMETHING to better yourself and your outlook.

- Jeff Emmerson

Moving Forward

Moi in the Montreal Mariott Elevator Dec. 31/09 - All Smiles

…And the editing process begins…Grueling, but so very important.

Stay tuned.

Poetic…

This says it all...

Simply poetic…After 5 years away, my return to Montreal made everything right again.

Life does go on after all…

*My Magical Return to Montreal! HAPPY NEW YEAR!!*

Me overlooking Montreal on New Year's Eve (day) 2009-2010!! **Click Twice for Larger Size**

I have lots to tell you, but it’s late, we just got back into town a couple hours ago, and it’s time to relax, but here’s a photo of the magical moment in time while I overlooked Montreal, and finally got the closure I yearned for, and in such a heartfelt and beautiful way. Words can’t express just how I’m feeling after finally returning to Montreal………

Stay tuned for the details of my magical  return!

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

Jeff Emmerson

From 5 Years to One Day Away!

DEC 28 2009 - How Beautiful is This? Wow.....(**CLICK TWICE FOR FULL SIZE**)

Wow, the last 5 years have passed by quickly, and yet at times, they’ve crawled at a frustrating pace. Here I am!!

Tomorrow night (actually Thursday morning, technically) at 2 a.m., we’re going to be starting up the rental car, and driving to Montreal!!! I can hardly wait, and I had to say something here a day before it all transpires.

I want to say thank you to everyone who has been supportive of my book project – You all have been wonderful friends, and quite frankly, I wouldn’t have nearly as much passion for what I do without the support from those close to me, as well as those of you I don’t know too well just yet. I’ll be pitching my book to one literary agency, since they have a publisher interested in my manuscript. If nothing comes as far as a publishing contract is concerned, then I’ll self-publish later this year.

Anyway, I’m going to live out a dream in the next few days, and finally put the finishing touches to my story before editing it, so this New Year’s Eve truly means the world to me. It’s been one heck of a long time coming…I’ve waited for so many days and nights to return to the city that was always there for me to escape to, through thick and thin in my life.

Happy New Year everyone, and stay tuned in 2010 for even more news and updates as I achieve yet another dream by becoming a published author!

BELIEVE, and have the courage to FOLLOW THROUGH with your heart’s desires. You get one life.

LIVE IT!

SEE YOU IN 2010!!!

- Jeff Emmerson

…

Montreal - Dec. 13, 2009

How one’s past haunts when recounting such moments as the wounds that took years to heal…Do they ever heal, or do we attempt to heal them through a deeper self-insight?

- Jeff Emmerson

2 Quick Thoughts:

My Next Hairstyle (roughly)

I’ve got such a powerful ending to tie up the end of my Autobiography (manuscript), that I’m touched deeply by it. It just feels so amazing to have written my heart out to become a (soon to be) published author!! Everyone should have such an experience.

It changes you from the inside

Secondly, the photo above is that of my next hairstyle. Change is good!

- Jeff Emmerson

Letting Go, and Starting Fresh…

Yet another photo of the exact setting where my final thoughts (for my upcoming book) will take place early in the day on New Years Eve, 2010.

I feel a cleansing coming on – one that’s been about half a decade in the making, and one that will be so very romantic and cathartic that I’ll never be the same, and in a truly wonderful way.

Perhaps this all seems a bit dramatic to you – and I understand if that’s the case, but remember that you too have deep parts of yourself that others might look at as “different” or “weird”, but who cares? It’s your life, isn’t it? Exactly. I’m not working hard on my book or this blog for those who won’t understand…I’m spilling my thoughts in these pages (whether virtual or actual pages) for those who will appreciate and understand them in one way or another.

As Montreal is just days away, I feel like a caterpillar shedding the skin to become a butterfly. That sounds cliche’, I know, but it’s the truth. I really hope that I’ll be able to convey my thoughts through words in the book I’ve created, since that’s why any writer does what they do – to convey their message in the best and most effective way possible, to reach readers most profoundly.

I suppose I’ll simply let it all out, and not “try too hard”, for fear of doing it less than the utmost justice.

Time (and the journey) is beautiful and heart-wrenching at times, though I’d have it no other way. Now back to my manuscript on this calm and relaxed Boxing Day of 2009.

- Jeff Emmerson

It’s Confirmed: We Have a 28th-Floor View of Montreal On New Years Eve 2010!!

Aah, I'm speechless. Stay tuned for my actual view.

I just confirmed with the hotel – we’ll be on the 28th floor with the city view of Montreal!!!

I get the feeling that at some point, I’ll just sit in the window, overlook the city, and record my thoughts on my voice recorder for posterity, as well as to help put the finishing touches to my Autobiography.

Wow, am I ever grateful for all the blessings in my life! I’m not a religious man, but I sure am a person who appreciates these moments along the journey.

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!! MAY 2010 BE YOUR BEST YEAR YET!

- Jeff Emmerson

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

December 23, 2009 - Similar to what my New Years Eve hotel view will be (Click twice for full size).

WOW – Just 8 days to go! Things are so busy right now while preparing baked goodies and getting ready for Christmas, so I’m working hard to also get my book done before the huge Montreal NYE trip!

MERRY CHRISTMAS, EVERYONE!!

- Jeff Emmerson

All Roads Lead To Montreal…Until This Chapter Ends, Anyway.

The view I'll have while finishing my book on New Years Eve 2010 in Montreal!

I think I’m finally getting this whole Montreal “thing” out of my system by continuously writing about it, about my return after five years away, and about the symbolism of the event, which is huge for me, like letting go of a chapter that was very painful and haunting, but at the same time special and cherished.

I don’t have all the answers, and perhaps that’s why I write – To get my thoughts out there in hopes that the answers will come, whether by the act of writing itself, or from replies to my work from other perspectives, which can both be life-changing to be sure. We can learn an awful lot from each other.

Have you written a book? How did the experience change you? How did you grow as a result?

I know that for me, whether I sell one copy or one million copies, I’ll be just as happy in the end, since I actually became a published author, and that some of the most important things in my life are right there on the pages for others to read and experience through my heartfelt words, humor, and ultimate hope.

Happy Holidays!

- Jeff Emmerson

Holiday Time, Montreal, and My Book….

Aahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh….The sound of me exhaling so deeply, as every ounce of stress from term 1 of university exits my body. How sweet it is.

Today is the first day of winter, and wow, I’m excited and in the holiday spirit!! I absolutely LOVE this time of year, and having a very special woman to share it with is the icing on the cake!

I’m very at peace, I confess. Once my book is out, I’ll be even more at peace with life itself, and throughout the struggles (journey) and joys that come and go, I’ll be living through them with eyes wide open, so that I’ll be able to account for my memories down the road in book form again.

Montreal is just TEN days away….Man, oh man…Five years of waiting will fly by in one night, but damn – I’m going to savor it as much as a human being can! Poutine, White Hot Chocolate, Jack Daniels and Diet Coke, lots of water added in between, lol….and so many other amazing aspects of Montreal will be enjoyed…Smells, tastes, the sweat on the dance floor, the smell of the cigar, the taste of the romance…’Feed all of my senses!

Back to FINISHING my book!  It will have lots of editing needed, but the “core” of it is just about done! A three-year project is coming to a close. I’ve never experienced such a feeling, and wow, I’m hooked!

HAPPY HOLIDAYS, EVERYONE!

- Jeff Emmerson

Well Said…….Well Said.

“Those who are blessed with the most talent don’t necessarily outperform everyone else. It’s the people with follow-through who excel.”

-Mary Kay Ash

Last Exam (Last day of university in 2009) Today!

Aah – It has arrived – My last day of university this semester!

Yeah, it’s Saturday, so that’s weird, but my Philosophy exam is at 3pm, and then I’m FREE! Don’t get me wrong – I LOVE being in university, but we all need to re-charge after busting our butts for any length of time, and this is certainly a perfect example.

Higher learning was certainly the path I needed to be on, so looking back over 2009, I’m grateful to have had such an opportunity for personal growth and enlightenment. The amazing part is it’s just the beginning of a new journey that will assist me in living my life on MY terms through investing in my future!

No more labor jobs, no more “wasted” time doing what isn’t in my heart, no more sense of lacking direction! God, it’s sure as heck been a LONG time coming.

That said, I believe that all of my struggles have been for a reason, and WOW, do I ever appreciate where I am now as a result.

I’m proof that you CAN overcome the odds and make something of yourself, inside and out, which puts ever-more responsibility on these shoulders to give back to those who had a much harsher upbringing than myself, even though adversity and challenges are relative to how we feel about them. My life flashed before my eyes in 1999, but I always had enough to eat…Nothing is black and white. I must remember that as I enter the realm of social work…

I was the lost young person those years ago. I had dreams, but I didn’t know if I’d ever make it. Now I know I’ve already made it at an even deeper level of self-actualization. It took a LOT to finally see that in myself. I know I can give back. I know that giving back will help me grow even further by helping others to grow one day and one challenge at a time, when they believe.

- Jeff Emmerson

Exactly 2 Weeks To Go!

I’m approaching 300 pages in my manuscript…I’ve hired a new professional editor who means business, and all is coming along nicely! I already have to pinch myself, I must admit.

I know it’s all going to FLY by, so I’m savoring the lead-up to NYE 2010 for sure. My family is well, my Grandmother is still enjoying life at 93 (soon to be 94) , and things couldn’t be better (well, they could always be better, but they’re damn good as it is, and I’m squeezing all the juice out of life, so I’m very content right now).

2010 is ours, and we can make our lives even more joyous and appreciative through following our hearts, making some big decisions (some might be scary, but they’ll change your life for the better in the long run), and giving back to our communities however possible.

Aah…Counting down to 2010 in Montreal will be so emotional this time around…I feel like I’m really living my life to the fullest, and going for it, having the guts to tell my story (which is often dark and gritty, as well as brutally honest), and making no excuses for who I am, or where I’m headed.

In the end, I want to know that I left every ounce of who I am “out there”, and didn’t hold back in life. There’s no point in dying with any music still left within, if you get my point.

Making peace with my past, moving forward, and loving the gift of life through thick and thin. 2010 is a huge year for me! Choose to make it YOURS as well. All it takes is a decision to grow even further, then the courage to back it up one day at a time, period.

Nothing is easy that’s worth while, and that’s the way it should be.

Yours in purpose,

- Jeff Emmerson

Make 2010 YOURS.

http://tonyrobbinstraining.com/439/special-holiday-message-from-tony-and-sage/

My First-Ever University Term Has 2 Days Left

Two exams left…The dreaded Statistics exam – admittedly, I put WAY more focus on the courses I was interested in, pulling an “A” in the Multiple Murder course, for example, and a decent mark in the Forensic Psychology course as well…Though Social Work will be my Master’s degree (and perhaps my eventual Ph.D). All of it is related, so knowledge is always worthwhile.

Anyway, the Stats final is Friday, then Philosophy on Saturday, which won’t be a problem at all. Stats – that’s my greatest challenge, and I’m going all out to pull off a pass. Fortunately, for my Masters program, they only look at my 4th year marks for admission, so by then, I’ll have a much better footing. After selling my car, moving to a foreign city and living in a student house with 19-year olds, it’s been one heck of an adjustment. The wonderful part is that I’m moving in with my girlfriend in the new year, so things will be so much more calm and stable at that time. We’re both going to finish our schooling in Brantford, then get the heck out of here, since we much prefer other cities to this one.

My MSW will be done in my hometown of Kitchener, so that will be great. I already have some great contacts in the field of social work, so my heart knows that this is all very worth it investment-wise. I’m so very proud of my girlfriend for returning to school as well!! Life is too short to settle for less than we desire!

With that said, ‘time to go nail the Stats exam. I’m studying with someone who has an amazing mark so far, so she’s going to help me master the review for the final. Once Stats is directly related to my field, I’ll ACE it.

P.S. – It’s almost Montreal time!!  (Can I NOT mention New Years Eve in just one post?) ;o)

Heck no.

- Jeff Emmerson

Powerful Life Lessons, as Mentioned in My Upcoming Book

Wow, how we grow and change with time. This was me five years ago, and I’ve lived an entire lifetime since those days, at least it feels that way.

I had to learn some very powerful lessons on my own, and that’s often been the case. Call me hard-headed, stubborn, or whatever else. How else do we learn but by doing, sometimes? The bottom line is that in anyone’s life, lessons are learned, so that we can avoid making the same mistakes over and over. I never dwell on negatives for long, since the only negatives are when you don’t learn from your experience. Everything we go through has within it the opportunity to learn and grow as a result.

As simple as this might sound, why do we tend to beat ourselves up over and over for past actions? I’m not looking back, and I’m certainly not who I was in this photo. I’ve evolved on the outside, as well as (much more importantly) on the inside.

Regret can only tear us down, and though it’s challenging, we must learn to let it go for the sake of the future. If you’ve already learned to do that, then kudos to you. Perhaps you can give back by letting someone else know that things do get better with time, increased understanding and greater self-insight.

The future’s always waiting.

- Jeff Emmerson

Decisions, Decisions

*Montreal amidst a beautiful snowfall on December 9, 2009.*

So I’m back to recruiting a new editor for my Autobiography manuscript, since the original editor I chose just wasn’t committed or professional enough for my liking. When it’s your life story, you don’t accept less than the best you can find, of course.

I’m also not sure which self-publishing company to go with just yet. Do I stay in Canada, or go to the U.S. to sign with the big boys of the game? There are pros and cons to every approach, so I’m finding that throughout this process, I’ve had to do my homework more and more, for fear of less than “to my standards” results.

Just two exams left, then I’m free to let the holidays truly begin, to be capped off with my return to Montreal……………………………I can’t express just how special this is!

…Life is indeed about the moments along the way. PINCH ME!

- Jeff Emmerson

Self-Publishing For Me

Ironic – Self-Publishing was the better choice for me after all, with everything considered. Two key reasons:

a) I can’t afford to wait for years to get published, and

b) I refuse to give up ANY creative control. This is MY story. No one’s going to edit out content but me.

Montreal looks especially beautiful this morning! (The Anticipation Builds)

Is it New Years Eve yet? Obviously not, since I don’t have to pinch myself…

(Click on the photos to enlarge, as always)

Anticipation is a tricky balancing act of enjoying the present, while remaining oh so excited about the future. ‘Focus too much on one, and the other can easily suffer.

Feel free to share your thoughts.

- Jeff Emmerson

Update

*Photo from the movie Conversations With God, which is an amazing TRUE story, and is also related to telling one’s experience through writing a book.*

OK – Here we go – I’ve got a literary agent with a team of editors who have 25 Bestsellers to their name, and am going to go the traditional route to get a REAL book contract from a REAL publisher. Time will tell…

- Jeff Emmerson

One of the Deepest Songs That Helps Me Write

I had to share this beautiful song with you. I’ve had it on repeat many times while writing my book, so here you go…Absolutely bitter-sweet it is. Many tears have fallen with memories in my mind and this song in my auditory midst…

**Play it on “HQ” for best sound**

- Jeff Emmerson

STOP! I Need to Re-Evaluate My Publishing Options

Photo courtesy of http://michaelhyatt.com

*As I said to a literary agent today…*

“You know Randy – I’m frustrated. I’m putting my heart and soul into my manuscript, and as you said – I just need to bring the “meat” out of it. I honestly believe there’s an empowering and gritty story here. Now I read of the horrors of self-publishing, and I don’t want to shoot myself in the foot, so to speak. What do I do?

I suppose I should pay the $ to go the traditional route (get a professional editing job done to get a real contract from a REAL publisher), and do my story justice. What would you honestly suggest? I’m willing to wait, if there’s hope of getting an eventual deal with a traditional publisher.

Thank you as always.”

- Jeff Emmerson

- Through further research, I’ve realized that there are MANY drawbacks with POD – Print on Demand publishers like Authorhouse, and I’m faced with my book taking a few more years to come out to get a REAL contract. Nothing is guaranteed, so we’ll see what happens.

Aah, the plot thickens!

- Jeff

A Powerful Quote or Two

“Scars remind us of where we’ve been…they don’t have to dictate where we’re going”.

- A quote from an episode of Criminal Minds that resonated with me, and I thought I’d share it.

…

“What lies behind us, and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us”.

- Ralph Waldo Emerson

- Jeff Emmerson

Five Years Ago, My Honeymoon Was Spent in This Montreal Hotel…

PHOTOS TAKEN BY: www.flickr.com/photos/guybrariang/

**Click on each photo twice to see it in full size**

Wow…I just received three photos of what used to be the Four Points Sheraton “Centre-Ville” at 475 Sherbrooke St. West in Montreal. My ex-wife and I spent our honeymoon here, and we had an amazing time before it all came crashing down not even three months later (all explained in my book). As I also explain in my book, this hotel was fatefully closed down last April as a result of an ongoing employee labor strike. I still remember the day I got the automated email message on my old Blackberry while I was still going to Conestoga College early this year…Wow. I even remember exactly where I was – In the library, right by the front desk, searching on the “stand up” computer, which could only be used for something like 15 minutes (all the others were booked). It was one of those moments you never forget, since it had immense personal meaning.

I had booked the hotel to make “new memories” in, since that seemed to be the poetic thing to do, as I’m such a sentimental person. I booked it on January 2nd of this year, right after spending NYE 2009 alone in my apartment, drinking on my own (which was so very unnecessary, but I was single at the time, so you know how it is). I was determined that NEXT time, I’d be going back to Montreal to finally get some “closure”, once and for all…Then that email made my Blackberry vibrate, and things took on an entirely different meaning for me.

So I have a great new acquaintance from the online photo world, and I asked him if he would be so kind as to take some photos of the hotel for me (It was bought by McGill University to be used as a new residence for undergrads), and sure enough, they arrived half an hour ago, and wow, what a wonderful (and touching) surprise. How could I not create a new post here?

I’m still speechless for the most part, so I’ll just upload the photos. As worn down and renovated/in the process as this building may look, it’s very special in my memory banks, never to be forgotten. I never did get to make new memories there, so in essence, it sealed the original ones forever in time.

Call me a romantic, call me crazy, but never call me shallow. “Montreal, I’m coming home soon to make my peace with the past and do it right.”

- Jeff Emmerson

My Decision to Self-Publish/Update

(The view from my bedroom at Nan’s house, where I was raised from the age of fourteen)

I’m at 264 pages and counting!!

I can’t wait for you to read my heartfelt story…I really can’t wait. This has been one heck of a labor of love, believe me. A ton of effort has gone into bringing my story to life.

After doing a fair bit of research into the pros and cons of publishing and self-publishing, I feel in my heart that the right choice for me is the latter. The reasons are simple: Keeping creative control, actually seeing my book published on MY terms (by late 2010), and setting my own royalties. Those are all the reasons I need, personally.

My case isn’t yours, so be sure to do your homework as always.

- Jeff Emmerson

Update

I’m now at 254 pages in my manuscript, and I’m giving it every last ounce whenever I sit down to write, like pouring out my entire contents each time.

This has been an experience deeper than I’ve ever known creativity-wise and as far as self-exploration is concerned. I’m exhausted and so very excited about this project. Writing a book is truly a life-changing experience. I know that now.

- Jeff Emmerson

Room With a View

**LIVE MONTREAL WEBCAM WITH THE VIEW WE’LL HAVE ON NEW YEARS EVE**

23 Days Left!!

Three very important moments in my life…

Top – The nightclub I’m going to for New Years Eve 2010!

Middle – The view I’ll have while finishing my last words in my autobiography manuscript!

Bottom – The Hall & Oates concert on August 30, 2006 that re-ignited my creative side, and inspired me to write my life story!!!

…It is indeed the journey that matters and means everything.

- Jeff Emmerson

Me, Cuban Cigars and Montreal…

I was just reminded of the fact that for my emotional and “chapter-ending” New Years 2010 in Montreal, I need to pick up a nice Cuban cigar. You see, the first time I went with the amazing friend of mine who introduced me to the city of such poetic nuances, we were able to smoke cigars in the nightclubs while we danced (sounds like a scary concept, I know). When my ex-wife and I went, I smoked one just after the clock struck 2005, just before I accidentally burnt her with a piece of ash amidst our celebration and excitement. She was OK, and we had a wonderful time.

You see why this personally monumental event requires the love-or-hate scent of Cuba’s finest, and far be it from me to disappoint. Apparently, we’re going to have some of the “world’s finest” Poutine, and while that scares me a bit (I think I’ll try a small bit, and see how that goes), I could think of no other place to have my first-ever taste of such a toxic food. I figure that since it’s so coated in fat, etc., etc., I should absolutely love it).

Moderation, they say…Well, they obviously haven’t been to Montreal for New Years.

That city demands more respect than just “moderation” ;o)

- Jeff Emmerson

246 Pages and Counting…

Wow, it’s 3:20 A.M., and I’m absolutely beat, after pouring out more of my heart onto the pages of my manuscript. As I’ve said before, amidst your seemingly never-ending 9 to 5 life of speed and chaos, take some time to STOP and smell the roses. You never know just how much you have left to enjoy , after all.

That’s my sermon for today, and now I’m off to la la land. Be true to YOU.

- Jeff Emmerson

Another Amazing Photo That Might End Up in My Book…

Photo courtesy of http://www.flickr.com/photos/guybrariang/3499475918

Obviously there will be some snow on the ground (hopefully), but here’s a great shot of where I’ll write my last words and finish my book December 31st… **Click on it twice for the full effect**

Wow.

- Jeff Emmerson

Montreal’s Got the Holiday Spirit!

Photo courtesy of http://www.flickr.com/photos/guybrariang/4151490829/

OK – NOW I’m in the holiday mood! What a beautiful shot of downtown Montreal while it wasn’t crowded (which is so very rare) on December 1, 2009.

**CLICK on the photo then click again to see it full-sized**

I couldn’t think of a better city to finish my book in.

- Jeff Emmerson

Traditional Publisher or Self-Publish?

This is a hot topic with writers everywhere. There are definitely pros and cons with both options, but for my money, a writer should at least try to get their manuscript picked up by a traditional publisher, and for several reasons:

- Much greater marketing capacity than as a sole-proprietor

- A nice fat advance cheque

- Greater credibility for future work

Obviously the list goes on, but at the same time, you give up a lot of the creative control with your book, if not all of it. I’m not a big fan of that, unless they do the job right, and stay true to the theme I have in my mind and heart.

Self-publishing lets you keep all the creative control, totally customize your book to YOUR liking, and a bunch of other exciting options are within your control as well. The thing is that you have to pay a pretty hefty fee to get it all put together, unless (like me) you do a lot on your own, like hiring a professional editor, getting your work into the format (such as the photos you want in your book) that the self-publishing company desires. The more you do yourself, the less you’ll have to pay, and that includes building your own website, marketing all over the world through book shows and the like, and going from there while researching successful authors who went this route.

I currently have a traditional publisher interested in my work, and they have large book shows worldwide on a regular basis, so I’ll be trying that first. If they don’t sign me to a contract, I’ll self-publish with www.AuthorHouse. com, who have helped famous and not so famous people everywhere to get their books published.

By the way – a self-published hardcover like mine (if I end up going that route) would look like any other book on Chapter’s shelves, it’s done just as professionally as with the traditional publisher.

Do your research is my ultimate advice. This is one choice you want to make correctly. After all, this is your “baby”. Do it the proper justice, whichever way you go.

- Jeff Emmerson

A New Year, A New Decade

Are you ready? 2010 is breathing down our necks, and I’m touched by just how much transpired in the forst decade of the new millennium…

September 11, 2001

M.J. died…

We nearly encountered another financial depression

…So very many other monumental things too, both public and personal. As I continue to work toward my book’s completion, I’m taking some time to reflect upon the decade of 2000-2010, and how I grew along the way.

How bitter-sweet the journey really is in the “end”. I know that even at thirty-three years of age.

LIVE it.

- Jeff Emmerson

236 Pages and Counting

Wow yet again…My manuscript is absolutely pouring out of me, and at 236 pages, it’s coming along nicely. I figure I’ll be somewhere around 300 by Christmas, but I’m not at all concerned with that, since the key is to have it be what it is, and not force the issue.

I’m still speechless about how fast this year has flown by. Man, I still remember the countdown to 2009 like it was just a few months ago, not an entire year…

Anyway, onward and forward while enjoying the journey. As always, stay tuned.

- Jeff Emmerson